Don’t Ask Your Monogamous Friends For Relationship Advice
Me asking a monogamous friend for advice about an issue in my relationship:
Me: "What do you think I should do?"
Them: "Just go back to monogamy!"
Me: "But the issue has NOTHING to do with polyamory, and even if I did that, it wouldn't align with my values"
Me to me: "I’m never asking this person for advice again!"
Top tip: if you’re polyamorous, do NOT go to your monogamous friends for relationship advice.
99% of the time, they will view your situation through a mononormative lens and blame polyamory for all the problems your experiencing. Or express confusion about why you are “putting yourself through this” when it would be “so much easier” to just go back to monogamy.
There are some monogamous people who are open minded enough to think beyond such a narrow world view where all your problems could be fixed by just changing your relationship style, but it is rare. Try and seek out support from polyamorous people with real lived experience of the issues you’re facing to get the best support. Or at the very least find people who aren’t just going to point to polyamory as the cause of all your problems.
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