Check In Before Sharing Distressing Information
Checking in with someone before you share something that might be potentially distressing or require some emotional support/labour from them is not only a decent thing to do, it also helps you assess whether they have the capacity to give you the support/response that you need.
There's no point in seeking support from someone who doesn't have the capacity or skills to give you what you need. That's why it's important to check in, and to communicate about what you're communicating, and check if they can receive it, before you communicate it.
This goes for a bunch of things - sharing bad news when someone is already going through something bad, asking whether someone is busy before telling them something that will take up a lot of time and energy, and so on. And on the receiving end of this, you are allowed to say you don't have capacity without it equating to not caring about the person who has come to you. There may be some hurt feelings, but it's something you can move through together.
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